Rules 4 Dating

Currently, I am in my late 20's and single. I have no clue why I am the girl to girl for  relationship/dating advice, but I am. Go figure! I THINK I have this dating thing down to a science. I say THINK, because hey we don't  know what we don't know.  After evaluating my dating life, I came up with these 4 rules to follow. This is just a theory, I haven't tested enough to make it a fact...lol. These rules can be applied to any type of  "Ship". Whether its a friendship, relationship, companionship, fianceship, booty callship, etc. Applying these rules will allow you the pleasure of putting your "Ship" into perspective in the very beginning with the end product of  you not having a sinking ship (there's that scientist in me again).

The Rules

#1

 Know Your Position

 Have you heard guys use the phrase "Know your position"? I use to think these guys were jerks, but they are right!  Know what position the person is looking for and what position you want in their life.  Let me clarify what I mean by position. Position is a metaphor for the type of "Ship". Some men are looking for mistress(es) a booty call(s), a permanent girlfriend, a wife, etc. Now, the BIG question is , "How do I know what the guy is looking for?". That's easy, ASK!! Yup, it's that easy. These questions occur during the getting to know you phase. Just as easy as breathing. You want to ask these questions effortlessly as if your asking about the weather. It is ok to be direct. For example, "Do you have a girlfriend?","Are you seeing anyone?", "Are you in a committed relationship?", "What are you looking for?"...whichever way you want to say it.  As long as you do not ask those questions all at once like an interrogation. Many times communicating with the other person they more or less tell you what they want without you having to ask. So, it is very important to listen to them. From that point you will be able to communicate and creating a comfortable environment by discussing what you want...That way there isn't any confusion on the type of relationship you both are entering, if any.

#2

 Don't Be In D.E.N.I.A.L 

Don't lie to yourself or be in D.E.N.I.A.L. As my Grandfather would say, "Some people are in D.E.N.I.A.L, Don't Even kNow I Am Lying.". If you have to ask your friends about what type of relationship you have with the other person, then there is something that's being lost in translation. Believe his actions and what he is saying. Don't try to evaluate the situation to make yourself feel better about the relationship. Trust your instincts. Generally, when a person asks others about a relationship, they are asking in hopes that at least one person will tell them what they want to hear.

#3

Have An Understanding Before Sex

 Never Ever Ever have sex with a guy before you have an understanding of the type of relationship you are entering. Make sure you are comfortable with it. This is a deal breaker. All bets are off  if your position is not confirmed. This totally sounds like applying for a job. Technically, it is...lol.

#4

Make An Informed Decision

 Make an informed decision, make sure you are comfortable with it and stick to it. Asses the relationship, evaluate the pro's and con's, measure the risk and be in the "Know" of what your dealing with it.


These rules have been working so far for me. I will continue to blog about my relationships and see if its flawed in any way... 

Til next time...